So much to do, so little time…

gotta book 2 sets of plane tix, looking for someone to sublet my apt till september, get out of my lease, get taytay on the plane, PACK,  dealing with my bro’s high school and NYU, get my hair done, shopping, SEE KEANE AND MANU CHAO, feeling bad for missing 311, and many many farewells…

so much to do, so lil time, gotta stop caking…

redo

sometimes you must erase the date to update. so this is now, and this is me, only he is no longer…

he is like the moon in Sweden’s early spring, bathing in Pandora’s unborn innocence. I watch him walking away, like Sade’s voice, coloring Jupiter’s shadow, foreseeing the plot of 2046. i open my soul to see his eyes, his lips, hands, his scent, blending with tender flaws. He is oh so special, for me to write a poem, and let it flow as snow spring rain tangoing rivering down the night sky, could never truly show the world what a beautiful man he is.

Few updates…

two words best describe my life in the last week: SPACED OUT.

it wasnt the kinda spacing out based on the lack of action, but the kinda when you standing in the middle of time square (where i will NEVER go), with sharp chaos slashing through from every angle, and what do you do? space out. and space out i did.

Heather came down to nail her apt, i ended up going out every night and working everyday, didnt go to babel on thursday due to a fight with twin and some major household action.

Friday we went to a bday party uptown (1st time going uptown this yr) and ended up singing some old rock songs (Blake inspired) and scared Alia and her friends… well done Attah, and ran into the one and only Forrest Renaissance who use to rock my tuesday nights with the dope Eclectic Ride music, but that era has officially passed, didnt make it to Forrest’s LES party later that night, ended up at CAKESHOP chatting with the girls about… life…. till 4am (did try to stop by Pianos to catch a show but people were playin Guitar Hero?!!!wtf).

Saturday I watched two Yankees/Mets games at work, didnt finish the second one, got a bottle of wine and went to a loft party uptown (2nd time going uptown this yr), ended up at some Irish pub to ask about the scores two blocks away from the party and it’s called O’Reily’s… i stood outside the pub and laughed at the name for five minutes… man the place had all the Brooklyn Dodger’s memorabilia, very depressing, and i had the oldest bartender who made me the nastiest magarita i ever had… and yankees lost… i went on to the party where i knew almost no one except Joe and Ross who my roommie Tara from college had a crush on and whose band she had snatched me to see in the purring rain at the Knitting Factory (where I swore never go back for very legit reasons), i missed most of the show but those cats were interesting characters, not my genre of music, but very unique, check them out it’s called TallyHall. Anyways the lack of familiar faces didn’t stop us from drinking endless cups of trade joes wine and eating chocolate bars and totally leveled up our BFB bad french behavior by engaging a long conversation about my once tragic love life, more depressing than the Dodger.

Sunday i ended up watching some Redsux game with Patrick while working at my bar as the worst and least attentive bartender in nyc, by sunday night when i struggled to finish some finale shows, i passed out royally.

Then came the weekdays, i didnt real remember monday, i never do, monday has been my invisible day for years, i just sleep through it. Tuesday was of course made special this year for the first time by one very cakelicious american idol, so i watched, very cakey, and got some text msg yankees updates about arods bad acts. Wednesday was simply fabulous, i sat as the only girl at Gastby’s, cheered for Milan with some italian mates and then Patrick and Heather came like right before the game was over, lame, we ended up with way too many bluemoons and notellas for our own good. Blake didn’t win, thank god, if i gotta hear him sing that crappy pop song one more time, i’d die, he is a REAL musician, f this s**t. Last night after making up with twin i sent my crew to babel and caught the 10pm show of Paris Je t’aime with Carolyn, Joe, Adrianna and her friend who looked a lot like Blake (i bit my tongue not to say that since im still happily in the american idol watching closet). Ok now this is where the anger kicked in, it sucked, even though it was exactly what i had expected and each short was like a bad trailer of what would the director have done with their features, so you pretty much have to love at least 80% of the directors to not hate the film or fall asleep halfway, it just showed not every director can director AND write. I was especially disappointed at Doyle (still love him to death) since i almost jumped out of my seat when his short started. Now after i told my french news updater Attah, even she decided to wait for the dvd to come out, no faith. Oh man. trying to remain hopeful for Once to be good… Afterwards the real drama started, babel was a mess, everyone was angry at something or someone, as Henry and I hugged outside the big wooden door and just looked at the scene and both agreed it was officially the end of an era, sigh, so much bittersweetness. So we ended the night early and the girls took a long walk, a beautiful night tho. Next Thursday we will do it one more time, one last time babes.

So this morning i woke up and bought a plane tix (roundtrip thank god), it’s that time of the year to take a break and hopefully i dont have to end up canceling and storing it as credit with Expedia like i did in Feb, gosh they love me. While we were waiting for the Blake-look-alike to get his popcorn at Landmark, surrounded by all the posters of movies I love and wish I had made, Joe said like he was speaking the truth: “you are gonna make movies.” That cynical laugh inside of me was planning its escape, but I kept my mouth shut, cuz I found it all so hopelessly hilarious. Even though the days of trying soooo bad to be good was way pass due, while i was becoming simple, bordering giving up and yet film schools, opportunities and even inspiration just flooded in from all direction. Aint life a bitch, when you cared least, it decided to make it happen for you.

I listened to all his music earlier when I was organizing old CDs, even those that brought back the most stupid memories, and I felt hopeful. Hopeful can never be bad. So maybe im finally ready for some Fort Greene and Clinton Hill action.

Awww. It’s summer again.

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Weekend madness

This wkd is all about organized chaos. CANT WAIT. Yah i got a handful. Very excited about all the events. muhaha. Game on.

blurbs

so tired yet still couldnt sleep… and wuts up with stupid detroit radio host’s hinted gay-bashing comment when asked Chris about his relationship with Blake. i dare him say that again, i double dare him, muthefucker! (yah pulp fiction)

Cris says II

Cris: wanna come to bryant park to have picnic?
Me: awwww… are you making me food?
Cris: no just bring some bread and put ham and cheese in it!
Me: …i dont eat meat.
Cris: it’s ok, you can give them to me.
Me: …NOT GOING!
Cris: WHY?????
Me: …

10 things a girl comes to realize during a flu recovery…

so i have been trapped at home for the past few days due to my first enconter with cold/fever/flu since last summer when i got an eye infection after the worldcup (surprise surprise). so all the pain, cold sweat, sick anxiety felt foreign to me and got me all sensitive. now that i’ve semi-recovered, i’d like to remember this memorable sickness by this what will be a very long and blah post.

1.
first shotout to roommie attah and poor lil dog taytay for their care and understanding. second sorrrrry goes to heather for screening (i was coughing!) and cris cuz i felt bad not there for happy hour, cinco de mayo, and attend some urgent problems.

2.
I found this on Merriam-Webster. (no i dont google the word “boyfriend”, i need a proper definiation to quote for writing!) anyways…

boy·friend
Pronunciation: ‘boi-”frend
Function: noun
1 : a male friend
2 : a frequent or regular male companion in a romantic or sexual relationship

So “boyfriend” means a frequent or regular male companion in a romantic OR sexual relationship, not AND.

Interesting… So ladies feel free to say you want a boyfriend and when things go bad just throw a dictionary in his face. lol

3.
“so do you think it’s right to judge men based on the kind of music they like?”
“well, im not gonna judge them based on what kind of music they don’t like, this year im trying to focus on the positive.”
i cant site the source of this conversation, but it was… LOL

4.
life is like a week. it’s really nothing more than a week. starting on wednesday when things just about to get interesting, a little disorganized, a little uncertain, then thursday comes, it’s youth, it’s fun, it’s filled with excitment, love and most important, the knowledge that there will always be another day; then friday brings a mixture of tiredness from a decade long of partying and the reality of work, realization the need for preparation; then saturday comes with friends, family, lovers, a little less cute, a little more adult, and one last attempt to feel free; then sunday comes, the first sign of slowing down, the classic moment that makes people buy an expensive car or have an affair, some just sit back and go with the flow, few are pumped to plan another game plan; then monday comes, the realization the rest of your life, the remaining is nothing but routine, but you take slow walks after work, with your lover, friends, family or dogs, you have a good meal or visit a museum, and you go to sleep wondering if tomorrow never comes until it’s too late; then tuesday comes, the last day, not nessarily the worst day, but it’s the last day, you still do what you have to do, you don’t look forward because there won’t be a tomorrow, instead you look back the seven very short but sweet days, miranate the best memories to take with you, and remember that first record that inspired you to be a revolutionist on that wednesday? that second record you danced to with your friends on thursday? that thrid record got you through tiring work day on friday? that fourth record your lover put on when you two made love on saturday? that fifth record you cried to when you felt depressed on sunday? and that sixth record that blended everything together, your city, your job, your people and your dreams on monday? remember? if you do, put them all on, that’s the record you will fall asleep on smiling on tuesday, the last day.

5.
i can’t smoke cigarettes anymore, as much im gonna miss them, i say it again, as much im gonna miss them!

6.
no matter how much easier my life will become, i decided not to move to upper west side. sure i will save a lot money moving there instead of downtown, but i cant lie to myself, AGAIN, i still remember when i first got my one bedroom apt on the upper east side 75th/2nd two years ago, i was singing “uptown girl” everyday just to convince myself in order to please my folks, they need to just accept the fact im a musican loving, free-spirited, now tattoo baring, somewhat artist/bartender and adopt another kid so they plug she or he to the uptown scene. (since my stepbrother is just plain… hopeless… that’s why i love him)

7.
im very excited about this month, especially when mid May arrives. i can send my bro back to China, phew, hop on a plane myself to Cali or god knows where. heather is finally moved here by then!!!!!!!! i was worried boston would take her away! Cris’ special friend is visiting, cant wait to meet him. the new reality show about filmmakers “The Lot” is starting, i hope they do well cuz im gonna audtion that someday, ha!

8.
i wanna go to a place just dance to jamiroquai the whole night!

9.
i thought about the men in my life while i was sick. of course i did i wont lie. and that’s it. lol

10.
oh. i’ve saved the best for the last. so i’ve been harrassing my girls with cake and kidnapping them to the AI tour this summer. uh huh. so i begged attah to come home and watch Idol with me last night, cuz you know we are worried about B B B Blake, he is all up there with three divas and without his man… cough, speaking of his man Chris Rich, must post this video first:

ok, Chris is awsome, he can sing to me anytime. back to Chris’ man Blake. so as soon as Blake started to sing, I looked back at attah, who was sitting in a what seemed to be a very uncomfortable position, shot me back an equally horrified look. the whole performance, both songs, were just… not good. not good. what can i say, i followed attah everywhere the next hour in the apt and tried to convince her the reason Blake sucked was because his man was no longer on the show, no hot sex before singing, uh huh, but Attah was more worried about her stew being too spicy. bloody hell at least she for once found SOMETHING too spicy.

anyways it was interesting how Blake changed the lyrics in the first song, changing all the word “woman” to “baby” and then second song, changing all the “she” to “you”. hmmmm. Blake, that hair, that outfit, that hip movement and now the lyrics change, you are just induging me with materials.

“be gone evil flu! be gone i say!”

sigh.

Milan going to final against Liverpool!

now it solved my dilemma between Milan and Man-U.  it’s gotta be Milan alllll the way, take that Championship League title!!!!!!!!! Kaka won in this Kaka V.S. Cristiano game, oh did Kaka won this one, he is so god sent!

the boys of futball future!

;)

;)

i hate to sound like a brat, but when i see something i like, i go get it (even if it’s in the rain) and i always nail it. heheh. sometimes so smooth i will totally dig myself too.

LOL

enough of early morning self-centered blurbs. my cell never works at kittning factory, so i didn’t vote for AI… finger crossed for the geeks in the pink

and may i say, sorrrrrrry Rangers lol